Today was easier to get through cause Nabs came over to spend the day. We didn't do much though; we just talked and talked and talked and ate and watched shows online together. But, we still spent time tgt and that's what matters :-) I love her to bits. xx

Was supposed to go to Pasir Ris Park to cycle with the cousins but the plan got cancelled, oh wells. It'll hopefully be postponed to Sunday though, insyallah! I can't wait to see Ridhuan & Radhiah again, I've got so so so much to tell them. I miss them already, sighpie.





goodnight world. x

burnnnnnnnnnn bitch burnnnnnnnnn

The Pregnancy Pact (2010)

Inspired by the true story of teenagers at Gloucester (Mass.) High School who agreed to get pregnant at the same time.

A show that just really made me............think. Hmm.

Rating: 3/5

Teen Spirit (2011)

The story is about Amber, a mean popular girl who gets electrocuted and dies and is not allowed to enter into heaven unless she helps the least popular girl in school become Prom Queen within a week, but things do not go as planned.

Rating: 3/5

Jackie Chan's The Accidental Spy (2001)

The Accidental Spy English Full Movie 特務迷城 is a 2001 Hong Kong martial arts action film, starring Jackie Chan and directed by Teddy Chan. Filming took place in Istanbul.

Although it is a Hong Kong film, much of the dialogue is in English, particularly during communications between the Chinese characters and the Korean and Turkish characters. Despite having a fairly serious and dark plot in some parts, it still features some humour, as is typical of Chan's films.

Rating: 3.5/5

Urban Dictionarayyyyyyyyy

Amira

1.

Amira is the girl you know who, if she was anyone else, you would consider really weird. But because it's her, it's just pleasantly eccentric. She is absolutely beautiful, but in an unconventional way. (not at all to say she isn't good looking by normal standards). She is someone who was into the things hipsters emulate, back before they were cool. Amira is someone you could trust enough to be your best friend.

	3.     Someone who is very attractive, smart funny and outgoing. Very hard toplease, but doesnt care because she can get any man she wants. Man-stealer!! Very confident borderline cocky. Can be girlfriend material with time.

So, I decided to randomly search up my name in urban dictionary cause I was curious as to what it means. Definitions 1 and 3 really caught my eye. The highlighted part in #1 is what I feel is most accurate, hehehe. The rest of it, I can't really say cause it wouldn't be fair to judge myself (?) Hahaha. Well, everything about it made me feel happy, really, except for the part which is striked through cause those bunch of words are making me reflect on myself. Am I really such a person? Hmm. I know it's silly to believe it but............sigh, nvm. I'm just being ridiculous, as usual.

A Fairly Odd Movie, Grow Up Timmy Turner!

A really short and sweet movie if you're in for a dose of your childhood from those Nickelodeon days~

Rating: 3/5

My Daughter's Secret (2001)

Watch the movie here.

Rating: 3.5/5

The Boy She Met Online (2010)

When teenager CAMI WINTERS (Tracy Spiridakos) falls in love, she falls hard.  Unbeknownst to her single mother TORI (Alexandra Paul), Cami has fallen in love with a boy named 'Jake' she's met on a social networking website.  Although Cami believes Jake’s a 23 year old college student, everything he’s told her online is a lie. 

Well, to me, it's definitely a movie with 'meaning'. It's not just some slipshod done kind of movie which doesn't hold any..........'meaning'. Ok, I'm just crapping but no, srsly, this movie is pretty good. It has an exciting storyline, not any fancy kind of well-known cast but that doesn't mean it's not good. It's not fantastic BUT it's good, for real :-) The whole plot may seem kinda overly-exaggerated but I'm sure things like this have happened before, even if it's just once but....it's still plausible. 

Just.......give this movie a chance, aye?

Rating: 3/5 (not amazing but not too shabby either)

21 Blackjack (2008)

"21" is the fact-based story about six MIT students who were trained to become experts in card counting and subsequently took Vegas casinos for millions in winnings.

It's honestly a really awesome movie in my opinion. I thought it's just gonna be some gambling shit but am I glad I was proved wrong. To me, it actually has a life teaching behind it and I absolutely loved how the ending of the movie turned out. The movie is really goooooooood :-) I'd say if you're bored at home during the holidays and you're looking for a movie to watch, make sure to put this down on your list of movies to watch.

Rating: 4/5

I'm not officially fit to give a professional movie rating but whatever. It's just my own opinion :-)

"Forgetting all the hurt inside
You'v learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come
And save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are"

The stupid caption at the bottom right hand corner just makes this picture so anti-climatic but oh well, you get my point.

A good morning text/tweet/wish always makes my morning :-)

Thanks khai!! ^_____^

"Not all scars show; not all wounds heal. Not everyone can see the pain someone else feels."

bloody valentine

"It's such a dirty mess imperfect at it's bestBut it's my love, my love, my bloody valentineSometimes I wanna leave but then I watch you next to meMy love, my love, my bloody valentineMaybe I should but still I just can't walk awayTry to convince me once again that I should stayThrough all the brokenness this bleeding heart must confessI love my love my bloody valentine" 

What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you?

TGIF, indeed.

The last day of Nov 2012 has been a greaaaaaaaat one. :'-D

It feels really fulfilling to finally have a month in the year which has somewhat stood out in a good way, throughout the close-to-365-days so far. 

Spent the day at the library and went to meet my mum at her office after that. Le dad picked us up and we went to Changi Village for dinner. The day ended off with a short shopping spree at Tamp Giant. 

It was a short but sweet day ;-))

Luv yaaaaaa. x

And I'm not keeping now, the strength I need to push me.

Tbh, I don't really know what to blog about nowadays, hahahais.

Well, I shall just type out whatever comes to mind then.

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday; it's a day of mixed emotions for most I guess. We feel happy cause it's still the weekend but then we start to feel the Monday blues cause another week is about to start the next day. It's all too fast, it's just scary. I can barely catch up with time nowadays. The phrase 'so much to do but so little time' is honestly an understatement as of late. It's like we don't even have time anymore. Like I said, this shit can get pretty scary for me. 

Idk what I'm doing with my life. Sighpie. I always say I'll do something but I don't achieve it in the end. What has happened to me, srsly? It's like I'm such a lazy piece of f*ck, it's not even funny anymore. I don't want to have to regret my actions by the end of next year when O's is around the corner. I'm not even scared; I'm petrified/terrified. It's like the moment holidays start, my brain is turned off. I can't seem to absorb any information nor even remember any of those I've learnt before. I swear this sucks sfm. Gah.

Been a little fucked up lately, not good. It all boils down to me once again. I let things get to me so f easily and this results in misunderstandings. This is evident from the shit that's been happening in the past few days. Major sigh. I've not been myself, I know and I sincerely apologize for that. I guess it's just my instincts telling me that shit's about to happen and knowing this, is keeping me from feeling 100% happiness. Sorry guise.

To Luqman, Natasha, Wei Xuan, Syahid and Syahmi, 

sorry you guise had to deal with my shitty attitude recently.

I just want you to know that whatever harsh things I may have said, I didn't mean it.

Ily all of you very much cause you guise have been some of the most amazing people I've ever known.

I wouldn't wanna lose anyone of you, yeppp.

A short update about today on the other hand:

I went to a wedding at Teban and spent some time with le cousins. Hadi didn't tag along though, that lazy ass. Camwhored abit with Nurul as well as took some polaroids once again :-) As usual, it was really hot and dreadful during the wedding but there were some sweet takeaways from it all as well (": Crapped alot with Nurul during the 2nd half of the day. That beech never fails to cheer me up with her mepekness, hahahais, love ya you ass ;* Oh and Kak Aisyah sang so melodiously at the wedding okay, I'm not even kidding. I wish I could sing like her, hurhur. Ok, dah, tmi.

Goodnight loves. x

I've been really happy cause you've made me this happy. 
Thank you and I love you. xx

Moving on now.

It's like I'm hanging by a thread.

"First, you think the worst is a broken heart
What's gonna kill you is the second part
And the third, is when your world splits down the middle
And fourth, you're gonna think that you fixed yourself
Fifth, you see them out with someone else 
And the sixth, is when you admit that you may have messed up a little."

I'm scared and confused. I'm losing people; they're leaving me so easily. 

I'm confused as to how I should feel, who I should turn to.

I don't know who too choose and who to believe. I swear I'm terrified.

And yet again, it all boils down to me. I'm such a screw-up.

Rewind.

This was on Wednesday afternoon with le #bbfl.
(Hey Nat, sorry I took so long to upload the photos!)
And I uploaded the unglam ones as well as you requested, hahahais :')

K, luv ya beech. x

But you're long gone, you've moved on.

likeabossyo:  (3:43 PM)
1) let go.
likeabossyo:  (3:44 PM)  
2) move on.
likeabossyo:  (3:44 PM)  
3) learn to stfu and don't mess things up for people
likeabossyo:  (3:44 PM)  
4) i'm a screw up
likeabossyo:  (3:44 PM)  
5) it's better to not confide thoroughly in anyone anymore
likeabossyo:  (3:44 PM)  
6) keep it all to yourself
likeabossyo:  (3:45 PM)  
7) possess an 'idgaf' attitude
likeabossyo:  (3:45 PM)  
8) i'm better off on my own
likeabossyo:  (3:45 PM)  
9) i have a huge social circle
likeabossyo:  (3:46 PM)  
10) better to keep that darn circle small cause all it's ever been doing for me is give me nothing but trouble, woopdeedoo




Don't mind the username and time postings, I copied this from the chat I'm having with wx rn.
But it's true, I've really learnt alot from recent happenings and experiences.
10 things I've learnt? It's all up there ^










If they were dumb enough to walk away, be smart enough to let them go.

But sometimes, it hurts instead.

So, before I go to sleep, here's a short update of today:

The day started off great tbh, mainly because Vino Alan, an X-Factor USA Season 2 contestant, followed me on Twitter! It was really unexpected because I didn't even tweet him to ask for a followback and what not. He's not my favourite on the show but definitely one of those whom I support and hope will go far. 

Here's the proof! Hehehe

Then, I got to relive my childhood by eating my favourite childhood snack! It's been years since I last consumed this yummy goodness! Up till now, I still don't know what exactly is the name for it. I just know that I call it 'wheel crackers' and so do a few others whom I know.

mmdapppppppp.

But, the day started to suck when the afternoon approached. Just the usual family arguments and shit. Oh well, I'm pretty much used to it nowadays but ofc, I can't deny that it still affects me every single time it happens. Shed a few tears, had Luqman & Nasrul console me and soon, I was back on my feet! I wasted no time in trying to cheer myself up by watching The Big Bang Theory episodes. I swear this show is like my 'sugar high/cocaine bliss'. Just a figure of speech though, not for real, lol. But yeah, it's f amazing. 

Pretty much slacked throughout the day. Sighpie. #whatsnew, eh? Managed to finish up the individual English holiday asgt though! (after days of putting it off) Sadly, I left a few blanks cause I didn't really get what they were try'na ask. Had the satisfaction of striking it off my to-do list! Hope to strike off more in the time to come! Anyways, I've just been listening to cover after cover after cover throughout tonight. And no doubt, my 3 favourite Youtube stars will forever and always be Max Schneider, Sam Tsui & Kurt Schneider. They are just flawless and perfect. I really wish I can meet them all in real life, please oh please. Wanted to donate to the funds needed for Kurt & Sam's debut album but I'm not old enough cause I don't have a credit card. Dang it, s'ok, I'll just support them morally hehehe. Can't wait for the album to come out! I'd most definitely buy it if it's on sale in stores in Singapore! Yeppp, that's about it!

Oh and hi Nat Bee, hope you had a great birthday! ;* 

I'll pass you your gift and letter tmr, ok?

Looking forward to our breakfast 'date' tmr morn~

See ya at Plaza Sing's Macs branch ;-))

Chill Murray.

Classic Archie comics digests on a Monday afternoon = a very happy Amira  ^______^

It's been a fairly good Monday and I hope it'll be an even better Tuesday. xx

Let the sky fall, when it crumbles

So basically, it's been a lazy Saturday.

Had emath tuition, finished up the individual part of eng hols hw and spent the rest of the day watching The Big Bang Theory, after having bought Arnold's Chicken for dinner from City Plaza which is just a short drive away from my place. Had hearty laughs while watching my current fave comeday (as previously mentioned) and overall, the day was good cause I managed to keep up my good mood for 2 days straight. But, as usual, something just had to fuck things up. Or should I say, someone. 

Basically, things took a turn downhill from there. It was just horrible, plain hurtful. So yeah, as a result, I've been spending the night, wallowing in sadness while having Hot Chelle Rae's 'The Distance' stuck on replay for about an hour straight or so. It didn't make me feel any better and I knew that but still, I couldn't help but play the song again and again and yet, again. The reason being, it reminded me of someone; someone who left my life 5 months ago but reappeared around 1 & a half months ago. At first, listening to the song for the 1st time in 5 months, didn't really affect me. But after several replays, everything kept coming back. All the hurt, pain and anguish that person caused me, I could literally feel it stabbing my heart repeatedly. I'm not even kidding. And at the same time, I was ranting to N______ about that person. I finally found the guts to talk about that person again in 5 months. I didn't know how to feel about it. 

I just started getting reminded of those few who made an impact on me and how once upon a time, they used to mean the world to me. They really did mean so much to me but now, we're nothing. It's sad to drift apart from people whom you thought would always be there for you. It's even worse when the time you had together lasts even shorter than expected. It's all too painful and sudden that you can't just swallow your pride and pretend everything's alright. It doesn't work that way. They left me hanging, one by one, and I had to pretend to be strong enough to get over them. I did, eventually, but it took me a hell load of effort and heartaches. It hurt so much to the point that I wanted to give up. I didn't see the point in fighting on. And rn, I seriously dk wth I'm rambling about. I'm just typing whatever comes to mind. 

So, I searched up each of their fb profiles (something I haven't done in a long, long time). I looked at their pictures and I smiled because they all seem so happy now. When they're happy, I'm happy. Who wouldn't want to see their loved ones happy? It's just part and parcel of life. I wondered how different things would be if we didn't know one another, if we didn't get closer and if certain things didn't happen. What would the outcome be like then? I'm seriously curious to know. Would things be for the better or for the worse? I have no clue cause I can't change the course of history. I can only pray for things to get better and then we won't continue to hold these grudges between us. I really wish I could be friends with all of them again. How I wish I wasn't so silly. I ended up crying just now. I just felt that I've been living life all wrong and yet, I can't do anything much about it because I can't go back in time and change things. I feel that I'm the crux of all my problems cause at the end of the day, it all boils down to me. I'm annoyed with myself.

I fall for people too easily. I trust people too easily. I give people my heart too easily. 

This has got to stop.

Watch the past go up in smoke.

It's Mondayyyyyyyyy, again, sadly.

I never like it when the weekends come to an end cause it feels like good times have to forcibly come to a stop and Monday just has to put a damper (is there even such a word lol) on my mood. Today has been a somewhat okay day. It started out great when I saw Muslihah & Nisa in school this morning. I smiled at them and they smiled back at me! :-D

Like c'mon, what better way to start off the day? I feel happy when people smile back at me :-)

Got scolded by my dad again in the early afternoon of today but I didn't let it affect me that much cause yolo, so why should I give a fark HAHA. While waiting for my dad to pick me up from Plaza Sing and send me back to school to hand in my WEP form, Luqman finally called me and we talked otp for the 1st time! It was so awkward cause he was speechless most of the time and I was making him laugh most of the time cause I was noobily trying to find my way around Plaza Sing, looking for the stupz taxi stand. It was a really short-lived convo but hey, it's better than nothing! My adik (Luqman) has a very cute voice. Hehehe.

Ate a quick lunch with Nat at Plaza Sing btw. Got the 2 for $10 lunch deal at LJS, tenenene. We were otp with wx for a looooooong time as well and I could have sworn I went a lil' crayyyy during that period of time. I kept spouting nonsense and saying random stuff. Idk, maybe the hunger was getting to me. Or the fact that Malay O'levels are on this freaking Wednesday and I only have one shot at this paper. I need the freaking A1, I really need it. If I can bag at least 1 distinction already, I'll be on my way to getting the 4 A1s I intend to get for my L1R5. Ofc, I should be aiming for more but if I can get this bare minimum that I'm aiming for, I'll be more than elated already. Insyallah, ya? :-)

Well, good day everyone.

Don't be cranky like my kittayyyyy.

Cause when you're fifteen;

Goodnight and happy 15th birthday to me. xx

I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose.

I really miss the UK and the friends I've met and made there.

Got reminded of Lloyd when Siti Maryam replied my tweet a few hours ago, containing the link to my picture with Lloyd which was actually tweeted a few days back. I believe she was stalking me but she didn't want to admit it hahahaha. Started spazzing over the hunky, dreamy dude once again hahahais. Changed my twitcon to the picture of me and him. Started getting alot of mentions from people like Mutiara, Amruta, Hui Yi and Maryam. Then, I got reminded of the picture above ^ HAIS, I seriously miss the awesome people at Brisham Green School, especially Lloyd (obviously), John (the crazy but adorkable guy) and the many other pretty girls and cutesy, pretty girls I befriended :-) I miss all of you, please come and visit Singapore on a school trip next year, please. I'll personally show you guys around despite it being O'lvls year hehehehe.

And I bid you goodnight with an amazing cover from one of my favourite musicians:

xx.

So chill out, whatcha worried about?

Tbh, I'm not sure what to talk about in this post. I'll just type whatever comes to mind then.

So anyways, the past week has been an emotionally eventful one (but not in the good way, sadly).

Everything's just been going downhill since Thursday, 25/10/2012, to be exact. PTM/PTC was the worst one I've ever been to in the history of my entire schooling life so far. I can't even begin to describe how fucked up it was. Imagine having your bad points thrown at you one after another and you try to stand up for yourself but in the end, you just decide to stfu and sit there in silence because you just simply give up as to what people want to think and/or say about you. You know you're better than what they say but like I said, you just end up giving up. You're too hurt to speak or even cry. You're just numb. And when you're actually upset, somehow, people see it as though you're portraying anger and hatred but no, they're wrong. But, you give up on correcting that point as well cause you're just tired and tbh, you really couldn't care less anymore.

I'm being treated like a prisoner rn in this household. Even more restrictions are being set up and I swear it fucking sucks. Idk how to feel or how to react. I try to not let it affect me but at the end of the day, I'm only human. I can't pretend like idgaf at all. As strong as the brave front I seem to put on, I end up crying like a sore fuck like what I'm doing rn as I'm typing this post. As to why I' m crying, it's because my dad decided to find fault with me yet again just a few minutes ago. I swear everything's just so messed up for me. I can't stand pretending that everything's alright in front of others when in reality, nothing is fine; none at all. 

This was initially meant to be a happy post actually. But after what happened, I can't help but steer this post in an emo direction. I'm sorry I failed to be happy yet again. Because everytime I actually succeed in cheering myself up, I end up getting hit back to rock bottom. I can never stay happy for long cause something is bound to fuck things up for me.

Btw, I apologize for the excessive use of  'f' words in this post. I rarely use much of it in my blog posts except for once in awhile when I'm really upset/hurt/pissed off/disappointed, etc. So, give me a break, aye? 

It's all way too complicated.

"Made a wrong turn, Once or twice
Dug my way out, Blood and fire
Bad decisions, That's alright
Welcome to my silly life

Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss "no way, it's all good", It didn't slow me down
Mistaken, Always second guessing
Under estimated, Look, I'm still around"

I love you guys sfm.

A great day/night with the cousins :-)

Sadly, Hadi, Haney and Riyadh are missing from this picture cause they were busy doing their own things at that point in time hahahais. Can't wait to meet them again next Saturday, 3/11/2012.

Like what the title says, I love you guys sfm. I hope you guys feel the same way towards me, heh ><

Goodnight everyone, xx. <3 br="br" nbsp="nbsp">

"Heal others by first forgiving and healing yourself."

goodnight, xx.

And I know I said it a million times.

Pretty scenic view of the sunset from the car while on the road just now~

HAHA ok I look like a faggot in this picture. Was bored while waiting for my dad to finish pooping at Bedok Point just now HAHAHAHAHA, k. I look so spastic here, oh well. Everyone's bound to have their unglam moments so.....yeppp.

So........today's been a real drag. Error analysis is just plain boring shit that I couldn't take it anymore and practically kept dozing off 3/4 of the time during EGeog error analysis after Emath & Chem earlier in the day~ I don't like the fact that SOME classes were just being total bitches by making noise while others who didn't score as well as them (including me) were actually try'na concentrate on the going thru of papers. And yet, here comes these inconsiderate twerps who can't stop talking at the top of their voices and chit-chatting like they own the damn place, asdfghjkl !@#$%^* Ugh, they fucking pissed me off I swear. Tobi got damn pissed off as well as Laurin. (See? I'm not alone.)

HMT intensive was productive and I liked how hardworking I was being hehehe *pats self on the back* 8-)

Let's hope the following intensive lessons will be just as productive as well! YAYZERS.

Oh and did I mention that The Big Bang Theory has released its 6th season episodes already?!?!?! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I CAN DIE HAPPY :')

Brb while I got watch the first 4 episodes of Season 6 before I sleep, heh.

Goodnight and have a good Tuesday tmr everyone! :-) xx.

Secrets.

But nothing's gained, nothing's won.

Yummy dinnerrrrrrr.

Things have only been going downhill from where we last left off.

I couldn't say or express it any better myself.

When nobody's around and my negative thoughts get the better of me, this is probably how I look like when I'm at my lowest and most vulnerable point. I just completely lose it and start crying the fuck out. But thankfully, it makes me feel better in the end. Letting it all out is definitely better than keeping it all in. So, those who have been strong for too long, just let it all out dears. Don't keep it in, please.

And to every single one of those who treat me like a spare tyre, _|_ you. Who the f do you think you are? You come to me when you're down and out but 'fly away' when you're all good? Seeriousslyyyy? What kind of bullcrap is that? Whoever gave you the permission to use people like that? I don't throw myself at you people. You make friends with me, you got close to me and when you feel like you've gotten bored of me, you dump me aside and go back to your 'clique'. Well, here's 2 words for ya: eat shit.

Ultimately, practically almost everyone's the same. 

It's hard to find people whom we can actually call 'friends' nowadays and you know what? 

That fucking sucks to an all time high.

Looks like it's back to square one.

EOY results have pretty much sucked so far.

Why is this not a surprise to me, though I wish I was surprised 'positively' this time round instead. 

Oh well, I screwed up yet again to the point whereby I'm asking myself, "Was I born to do this?"

And it'll just go back to moping and wallowing in self-pity. Then, self-denial that everything happens for a reason and things will only get better blah de blah de blah. And next, here comes all them motivational, tumbr-inspired quotes, hoping that they will help you get back on your feet. So, you decide to give it yet another shot and the outcome...........well for me, it's just been shitty shit ass for me so far.

What's your outcome? Good or bad?

Break Even.

The Script are inspirational, their music actually has a meaning and is so amazing. Their beautiful inside and out and don't autotune what so ever. Their my favourite band of ALL time. Their really sweet, funny, kind, loving, down to earth, and irish;-). They support and love their fans more than anything and don't beg for fame. They want to be known for their music and nothing else, thats why they don't put their faces on their albums. I LOVE DANNY O'DONOGHUE, MARK SHEEHAN AND GLEN POWER!

Couldn't have said the above ^ better myself :')
This is what a fellow fan commented on the following video:

HEYYY DURRR.

#ootd for cca today

Finally returned this amazing book.
I felt really sad having to part with it okay :'(

Before

  

After

Clearly I'm promoting iphone picture editing apps here. Just fyi, I used Bokehful for my #ootd pic at the top ^ As for the 4-grid one, I used Actioncam and Typic to come up with the final product. 

Here's a mindblowing image of the day for ya:

COOL OR WHAT. The 'hairs' look so real HAHA. Oh and check it outtttttt, spot 69% up there? If you don't know what '69' means, clearly you're either too young or too innocent-minded.

Cca today was pretty okay, planned le Nov b'day outing with Nat & Janani as well! I really hope things work out and my parents allow me to go for this one hais, pretty pretty please :-(

Anyways, gonna sleep now, wake up around an hour later, do 1 ML practice paper (since ML O'lvl is less than a month away), plan my next 2-3 weeks out on Google Calendars and then watch my HK drama! After that, I'll probably look through le peribahasa list and then figure out a way to tell my mum about the Nov b'day outing, in the hope that she will allow. Sigh, I really hope she gives me the permission to go T-T Wish me luck guise, I really, really need it. :\

P.S. Bridgit Mendler is my new girl obsession. (I'm perfectly straight though.)

Have a good day! xx